20 Historical Suitors Who Were Publicly Rejected

Alcibiades was handsome, ambitious, and very accustomed to being admired, which makes his unsuccessful attempt to seduce Socrates all the more memorable. In a famous dialogue from classical philosophy, he recounts having tried to win Socrates over, only to realize in the end that the philosopher, who was older than he was, was more interested in virtue than in love.

Honoria sent a ring to Attila to ask him to help her escape a marriage she did not want, but Attila interpreted this gesture as a marriage proposal. The Western Roman court rejected his proposal—including, according to some sources, his demand for half the empire as a dowry—and this unwanted union led to a serious diplomatic crisis.

William of Habsburg had been betrothed to Jadwiga since childhood, but the political situation in Poland changed as soon as she became queen. Jadwiga eventually married Jogaila of Lithuania, and William’s claims to the throne, now relegated to the background, became part of a much broader narrative—that of dynastic power and the Polish-Lithuanian union.

Isabelle of Castile was still a young princess when Pedro Girón was proposed as her husband, as he was considered a useful political ally. She is said to have opposed the match, which she deemed unworthy of her dignity, and the plan fell through.

After Jane Seymour’s death, Henry VIII considered marrying Marie de Guise. Marie refused his proposal and instead married James V of Scotland; tradition later attributed to her a quip that her neck was too slender to bear Henry’s marital past.

Christina of Denmark was young, a widow, and a political asset when Henry VIII’s court took an interest in her. Her portrait was part of the wedding preparations, but she is said to have rejected the idea, declaring that if she had two heads, one of them could have been offered to the King of England.

When Mary I ascended the throne of England, Edward Courtenay seemed to be an asset to those who wanted her to marry an English nobleman. Mary, however, chose Philip of Spain, leaving Courtenay publicly sidelined at a time when England was embroiled in debates over religion, foreign influence, and the queen’s future court.

The proposed marriage between Prince Edward Tudor and Mary, Queen of Scotland, was a major dynastic strategy. Scotland rejected this alliance, and the collapse of the plan helped trigger the violent English campaign known as the “Rough Wooing.”

Philip II had already been married to Elizabeth’s half-sister, Mary I, when he became one of Elizabeth’s potential suitors. Elizabeth rejected this union with Spain, wishing to avoid marrying a Catholic whose presence might have caused unrest in a kingdom already plagued by religious tensions.

Eric XIV of Sweden was another royal suitor who hoped that Elizabeth would turn the marriage talks into an alliance. Elizabeth knew how to use these advances to further her political agenda without falling into a trap, and Eric joined the long list of men who had come to realize that her independence was no passing phase.

Archduke Charles of Austria proposed another prestigious marriage on the continent to Elisabeth, but the religious differences were hard to ignore. A Catholic husband from the House of Habsburg would have caused concern among many of her subjects; the negotiations therefore petered out, and Elisabeth retained her crown.

Robert Dudley, Earl of Leicester, was Elizabeth’s favorite, and the rumors surrounding them were dangerous. He remained by her side for years, but she never married him, preferring to preserve the safer public image of a queen who belonged to her kingdom.

François, Duke of Anjou, was the one who came closest to winning Elizabeth’s heart among all her suitors, even going so far as to court her in person. The prospect of their marriage sparked concern throughout England, and after years of flirtation and negotiations, Elizabeth chose to let the romance fade rather than risk a public outcry.

Queen Christina of Sweden was under pressure to marry, and her cousin Charles Gustav was the obvious dynastic choice. Christina refused the marriage and instead named him her successor, thereby providing Sweden with an heir while sparing herself a life she clearly did not wish to lead.

Princess Charlotte of Wales was pressured into marrying William, Crown Prince of Orange, as part of a union dictated by diplomatic and family pressures. She broke off the engagement, in part because she did not want to move to the Netherlands, and later married Prince Leopold.

The relationship between Princess Margaret and Peter Townsend became the subject of a veritable national media circus, as he was divorced and she was the Queen’s sister. In 1955, Margaret publicly announced that she would not marry him, thus turning a private romantic disappointment into one of the most closely followed royal decisions of the century.

Before marrying Constanze Weber, Mozart had fallen in love with her older sister, Aloysia, a talented soprano. Aloysia did not share his hopes for marriage, and this rejection became part of the public narrative surrounding the early years of Mozart’s career and the family of musicians he later joined.

Hans Christian Andersen admired Jenny Lind, the famous singer whose fame extended far beyond her native Sweden. Lind considered Andersen a friend, but she did not wish to marry him, and his unrequited love became part of the emotional mythology surrounding her life and work.

The hopes that Friedrich Nietzsche placed in Lou Andreas-Salomé became entangled in one of the strangest love triangles in the history of ideas. He longed for marriage; she longed for independence; and her refusal hurt him, while allowing her to preserve the freedom that shaped her remarkable career.

Long before he became president, Abraham Lincoln had been involved in an awkward romance with Mary Owens. His proposal was more a matter of duty than of passion; she was clearly aware of this and therefore decided to reject him.